I saw this over at Creature Comforts and I HAD to participate. I really try to be honest on this blog, always have. But, I want to do this to remind myself that there really isn't anything worth writing about if it isn't honest. Ez, you're a genius.
And now for my list. Ugh. Here we go.
- I am a really, really bad eater. Now and then I'll make something amazing and healthy...but we eat takeout a lot. And I'm not talking pretty rolls of sushi. In talking pizza. Sometimes I make Kraft Dinner. Yep. I want so badly to be the wife that makes big awesome meals every night. Maybe I'll get there. Maybe I won't.
- I'm not even a little bit confident about my art...the fact that I've sold one painting blows my mind. I am trying to get over that because it's hard to market yourself if your always thinking in the back of your head that maybe you're a crap artist after all. But I think that pretty much every day.
- I worry way too much about money. It's not something that Billy and I have to worry about right now, he has a wonderful job and he's supporting our family entirely. But I worry anyway. Way too much. ALL THE TIME. And it drives him nuts. (Sorry babe...I don't know how you put up with me).
- Every night I rock and/or nurse Ben to sleep. It's the biggest no-no, I know. He still can't be just left in his crib to fall asleep on his own, and it's all my fault. I didn't know it was a bad thing at first. Guess I should have read some of those baby books after all.
- Speaking of Ben...I let him watch tv. NO, not constantly, but sometimes I'll have it on for longer than ten minutes. I know, I know, I've read the reports. But sometimes I need to put in a load of laundry, or check my email, or read a magazine. Sorry.
- I mention having OCD is a jokey way now and then....but I actually think I do. It's never been diagnosed, and it doesn't affect anything serious (I can leave the house, for example, without checking appliances) but some things that I do are a little weird. Billy and I were laughing at this last night, but it's a perfect example. We eat these candies a lot (see, really bad eater) and I always eat all of the lemon ones first, followed by grape, then cherry....last ones are always strawberry because they're my favourite. I would be seriously, seriously bummed out if the last one I ate was strawberry. Ya. Seriously, someone call my doctor.
- I can be really, really moody. Lucky for whoever reads this blog I tend to write when I'm in a decent mood. But just ask my husband, or my Mom. I can be awful. I don't know how everyone doesn't hate me sometimes. One day I may very well end up alone because everyone's sick of me.
- My basement is a DISASTER. Like it's piled with boxes and bags of crap. PILED. It's the equivalent of Monica's closet on Friends.
- I can't ever make a decision. When faced with any sort of choice, I have to refer to Billy, my Mom, my Dad, my girlfriends, get everyone's opinion, write a pro-con list, and THEN I decide. Followed by months of second-guessing my decision.
More will come to me, I'm sure I could write a list a mile long of these. But this is a good start. Maybe this will make me a little bit more accountable to my goal of becoming a better person. Or maybe this is just me. AH. I'm really not awesome.
Image via Creature Comforts